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Start Living for Yourself: 7 Ways to Do It Right Now

rock formation in Puerto Escondido showing when you start living for yourself you'll see wonderful things.

Have you been living your life for everyone else but yourself?

Don’t run away from the truth. It’s okay to admit it. Some people live their lives according to other people’s expectations. They do what they think is best for others while ignoring their own desires.

But, if you absolutely want to be happy, you must make a few changes!

So, do you want to start living your life for yourself?

Here are 7 ways that can help you start living for yourself right now!


What Does It Mean to Live for Yourself?

Living for your own happiness, desires, and dreams is the ultimate meaning of living for yourself. Simply put, it means living in a way that is most fulfilling to you!


How Can You Start Living for Yourself?

Start by doing an audit on your life. How do you envision the life you want?

How do you see yourself living?

What do you want to accomplish in your life?

What are the things that will make existing worthwhile?

Do more of those things!

Write down these thoughts, so they become a part of this physical realm and don’t only exist in the imagination realm, your head. Then make a plan and execute everything on your list.

It sounds easy, right?

Well, I assure you, taking the first step to start living for yourself will be the hardest, but it will be worth it!

You will find living for yourself is the most satisfying way to live.


Is It Selfish to Live for Yourself?

If living for yourself is selfish, then living for others is even more so!

If you are living your life to please someone else, that’s not living at all. In fact, it can be downright toxic because they may never let you do what makes you happy.

But if anyone has a problem with the decisions you make to live out your own desires, then they are the problem. You should feel as free as a bird to live the life of your dreams.

If that makes you uncomfortable, then it’s time to learn who you are without others influencing your decisions.

Thinking it’s selfish to live for yourself does show how empathic you are to others, but it also highlights the elephant in the room. You are ignoring yourself out of fear of what others might think.

I’ll let you in on a little secret; they really do not care.

Most people are caught up in their own lives and their own problems to truly understand your perspective, so if they disapprove of your emancipation, it’s only because they have ulterior motives.

Some might not want to see you excel because they’re stuck and misery loves company.

The life you live is yours 100%

You are the one who has to deal with the consequences of your choices, not someone else, so it’s time to live unapologetically for yourself.

Here’s how to do it:


1. Stop Living for Other People

As explained earlier, people have their own lives to worry about. You should focus on your own.

Live in a way that will make you happy, not someone else!

Acknowledge that it’s okay to want something different from what other people might want, you’re unique, and your aspirations are yours.

Walk away from toxic relationships!

You deserve a life with people who love you and support your individuality. Eliminate the ones that make you feel like you’re less of a person because they think differently than they do.

Remember, the life you live is yours to live. Others might influence you to make it better, but ultimately the choice should always be yours and yours only.


2. Find Your True Self 

Self-discovery plays a huge part in living for yourself.

Ask yourself who you are without existing in the shadows of others, and don’t let your past traumas dictate where you go from here.

Be true to what you want by discovering who you are and what your goals and aspirations are.

You can begin your journey of self-discovery by starting a journal.

Dive deep within your mind and learn your inner values, your personal beliefs, your power, and your purpose.

I believe in the power of journaling. I always encourage my friends to start a journal because I believe it has saved my life on many occasions.

Journaling is a powerful tool because it allows you to explore who you are and what makes life worth experiencing.

Write down your thoughts so they can be untangled, tangible, and living guides to be used as a guiding force in the progression of your life.

Discovering your true self allows you to understand why you desire the things you do, and it also assists you with moving forward in life with more confidence.


3. Change Your Mindset

Change your mindset, change your life!

Everything begins and ends with the mind. If you want an opportunity to live a life that is truly worth living, then it starts by changing how you think.

The way we perceive ourselves as well as others has been ingrained in us from birth.

We live in a society of comparison that has taught us to compare ourselves to others and their accomplishments.

This is what I want you to do, stop comparing your life with someone else’s!

You’re living YOUR life, not theirs, so stop letting them define who you are or the things you desire while they live out THEIR lives how they see fit.

Your mindset has to undergo a transformation if you want to see tangible changes in your life.

Start with your thoughts. Change the negative ones into positive challenges that need to be addressed and dealt with.

Examine your thoughts and be honest about how they’re affecting you. This reflection will help you to understand what’s holding you back from the life you want to live.


4. Live in the Moment

Forgive the past, plan for the future, let go of expectations, and savor the moment.

The present moment is the only time that matters right now. You can’t change the past, so learn from it. You can’t predict the future, so plan for it. What you can do right now is be in this moment wholeheartedly.

Forget the problems and the pain. Create your happiness along the way by learning to be present.

If you want to live a happy life, do what makes you happy right now.


5. Put Yourself First in All of Your Decisions

You are the most important person in your life. Not your partner, not your parents, and not even your kids.

Everything and everyone else on your important list come after you. If you’re not number one, then you need to re-evaluate your list.

Make decisions that are rooted in what’s best for you, not everyone else.

This might seem selfish at first, but it really isn’t because living a life where you’re constantly putting other people before your own needs will leave you feeling exhausted and resentful.

How can you be your best for the ones you love if you actively ignore yourself?

Yes, include the people you care about when making important decisions but do not forget that the person on the top of that list needs to be you.


6. Do Things That Scare You

Do things that scare you. It’ll make life a lot more fun.

Do you know why most people avoid doing the scary stuff? It’s because they’re scared of what might happen to them if they fail or get rejected.

But a life without tackling your fears is a life without growth.

You can’t grow as a person when you actively avoid doing what scares you.

There are many things you may be afraid of doing, but that shouldn’t deter you from doing them.

Do things that scare you and watch your confidence grow to great heights you’ve never imagined.


Life is a long lesson in humility - James M. Barrie


“Life is a long lesson in humility.” – James M. Barrie


7. Be Kinder to Yourself

We tend to beat ourselves up about everything we didn’t do well, what we didn’t accomplish, and all the other things that fell off our to-do list.

But it’s time you change that type of mentality by being kind to yourself, no matter the shortcomings.

Fill your life and thoughts with acts of self-love, acceptance, kindness, and forgiveness for your mistakes.

Mistakes aren’t the end all that people make them seem. They are, however, lessons for you to learn and apply during your next time around.

Give yourself a break. It’s okay to mess up sometimes. You are human, after all.

Living authentically, being truthful about who we are, and living with integrity requires you to be kind to yourself.


Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Don’t just entertain the idea of living for yourself, do it.

Prove that it’s possible to do things differently without following the crowd.

You deserve a happy, fulfilling life that is your own without the interference of others. It starts with self-love, acceptance, kindness, and forgiveness, no matter what mistakes you’ve made in the past or will make in the future.

What is holding you back from your best life? Why not take the necessary steps toward happiness today?


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Jody is a creative writer, artist, graphic designer, and a digital nomad who also helps people live more fulfilling lives by finding creative solutions to their personal growth and development problems and lifestyle challenges.

5 thoughts on “Start Living for Yourself: 7 Ways to Do It Right Now”

  1. Seriah Sargenton

    I love this post! It’s true that learning to love yourself is the first step to finding happiness and living your best life.

    1. Jody

      Thanks for reading Seriah, it really all starts with you!

  2. Great post. So true. Some great lessons to teach young and old!!!

  3. I love your suggestion of living in the moment and focusing on your own well-being.

  4. Nicolle

    Love this post, there is so much truth!!! Doing things that scare you and live in the moment were my favourites 😉 Thanks so much for this inspiring post!!

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