There’s a huge misconception that somehow became a common understanding: if you want to be happy, then you must follow your dreams. But what about the other benefits of simply going after what intrigues you?
I’ve been chasing my dreams and indulging in my desires my entire life. I chose not to take the traditional route of becoming a lawyer or a doctor but instead to travel the road of an artist. An artist with multiple skills.
I write, draw, sing, film, dance and make music. I always tell people that I embody the word artist because I’m not just one, I’m many. That always either intimidates or impresses. It truly depends on the level of self-confidence the person has.
I didn’t choose this route, I was born to be an artist. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have to actively choose to stay an artist. It’s an active choice, sometimes daily.
It’s easy to give up on my “silly” ideas and get a “real” job to live an entirely different, maybe better life, but I keep choosing to follow my desires, not only to experience bliss but to experience the other benefits.
The Illusion of Happiness
It’s been four years since I decided to follow a dream I used to speak about with regret daily: starting a YouTube channel. During those four years, I’ve learned that following my desires is way more rewarding than the elusive pleasure of uninterrupted happiness.
I’m not happy one hundred percent of the time simply because I’m traveling the route that chose me. I go through constant self-doubt and debilitating depressive episodes, but I never allow them to stop me from pressing publish on whatever I create.
Low times do indeed delay progress, but I’ve learned that if I allow them to stop me, the low times will keep getting longer and longer. In a way, creating things brings back the light that eventually heals me to keep moving forward.
The Urge to Keep Going
When your spirit, your mental well-being and your physical body feel rejuvenated simply by doing the thing you desire, you’ll find that not doing it is not an option.
I’ve stepped away from some of my skills for a few years, but the urge to keep drawing, to keep dancing, to keep documenting never left me. It showed up in different ways that, at the time, I did not recognize.
For example, my skill and desire for making music and singing have been on pause since a tragic situation happened a few years ago, but that didn’t stop me from creating soundtracks whenever I was bored and scoring my films when I wanted to be an overachiever and do all the parts myself. The songwriting words didn’t stop flowing. They found another outlet through blog posts and voiceover film scripts.
I switched directions to protect my mental health, and the skills and desires I have evolved to fit themselves firmly right where they belong. Honestly, there’s no part of my life that they don’t belong to. They make me feel complete.
The Challenge to Simply Do Things
Every day I choose to go against the grain is a reminder that I’m actively choosing what I want instead of something dictated by someone else.
Let’s face it, it’s much easier to go along with a “proven strategy” than to forge a path of your own in the dark. You set the destination, then build the GPS to direct the way. Everything is experimental and being tested for the first time, so failure is a byproduct that should be celebrated, but because of previous conditioning, it’s feared.
Experimenting despite feeling fearful is something I’m still learning to become more comfortable with. I understand that there is absolute freedom in having an idea and seeing that idea manifest, but sometimes the idea gets stuck in the thought phase, the research phase, instead of moving forward to the experimental phase.
But the experimental phase is where all the knowledge is gained. It’s where I’ll decide if the idea was a colossal waste of time or where I’ll learn what I need to do to improve and integrate it.
That doesn’t change the fact that venturing into the unknown takes a whole lot of courage and stubborn belief that one day all the mistakes and reroutes will be worth it.
Learning to Go with the Flow
There will always be abrupt reroutes and tricky roundabouts on this journey of desires. The truth is, we have zero clue what we’re doing half the time, but we continue to follow the feeling that we’re doing something good for us.
This feeling comes before the thought to press publish crosses our minds because we are our worst critics.
Before an idea is shared, it’s extensively ripped apart, glued together and torn apart again to see if the glue was strong enough. The idea has to get past all our self-doubts, all our second-guessing and all our thoughts that what we’re doing will never work.
But if there’s one benefit that stands out above the illusion of uninterrupted happiness, it’s the ability to maneuver, flow and continue whenever the path changes.
The path always changes no matter how detailed I’ve planned the journey.
Because of this, I’ve learned to listen more intently to the ideas that randomly present themselves at the most inconvenient time because let’s face it, ideas have zero manners and patience.
Following these ideas into the unknown is the reason someone else may think it’s simply magic for someone to draw so well, sing so well or write so intuitively. But what they don’t understand or choose to overlook is that the same fears they feel about doing something they care about are the same fears we all feel when we’re given a path to follow with hidden outcomes. The difference is that those who choose to follow the path are simply going with the flow, following the ideas wherever they lead and doing it scared.
Do It Scared
The fear never goes away, no matter how skilled you are or how experienced you are. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned these past years.
The fear that held me back from going after my desires was simply that, just fear.
I’ve learned to work alongside the fear instead of trying to eliminate it before I start. It doesn’t matter how long my journey in life will be, I now understand that fear will always be a close companion. So instead of paying it attention so it can grow bigger, I’ll simply acknowledge its presence when it tries to take over, then go back to ignoring it and continuing to chase my desires.
It’s sort of comforting, in a weird way, to know that I’ll always have a companion on this journey. An unwanted, doubtful and annoying companion, but a companion nonetheless.
So if you’re still skeptical about going after your desires, please understand that happiness isn’t the end goal. It’s all the other benefits that build you up so you can keep putting one foot in front of the other at your own pace.
I’m proud of myself for finally turning a regret into something I’m now celebrating four years strong. All the delays, tears, failures and exhilarating moments were worth it. I can now say, I always wanted to do it, so I did it.
So, my question to you now is, what’s really stopping you from chasing the thing you keep thinking about? Let me know in the comments below, or if you want to share it with me privately, join my newsletter. You can sign up here.
